An open letter to my “special & determined son,
Last night was a long, dark night. As I sat next to your bed rubbing your back and listening to you whine with every cough you took, I realized this is where I’m supposed to be.
As the same music that we have been listening to since you were two weeks old plays in the background, certain songs bring me back to those long, dark nights sitting next to your bed in the NICU.
Anxiously watching ever monitor that was hooked up to you. Hoping that you didn’t hit certain numbers that would make the alarm blare in my ears, causing me to rush over to your bed, only to see my precious little baby hooked up to tubes and wires. All those long, dark nights I realized this is where I’m supposed to be.
Whether you do or don’t, I pray to God, that as my face gets another wrinkle on it and the circles under my eyes get bigger and darker from the 5 hours of sleep I usually get a night, to give me the strength to care for you when you are in pain and want to be comforted, because this is where I’m supposed to be.